A Bunch of Babbly part 2

Depression still going strong, throw in anger cuz that is how I role.  I am super angry at everything and snapping at Teresa right and left.  I have no reason to be angry, things here are moving towards our goal of getting us prepared to go to Mayo for my Stem Cell Transplant.  Depression and anger often manifest together with me (so does mania and anger, for that matter).  However, I haven’t been depressed for a long time in a long time, and this one really has a hold of me.  And now anger on top of it.  I would take another clonazepam to disconnect, but I slept enough today already.

Speaking of sleep, 7 1/2 hours, 3 hours, 1 hour.  11 1/2 hours total and I am still stupid tired.  After 7 1/2 hours on a CPAP I should feel totally refreshed and ready to be awake for the day.  Nope.  I admit that the CPAP keeps me from waking up as much as I do without it, but it still doesn’t stop all the wake ups.  Stupid machine.  Then I took a 3 hour nap, and another 1 hour nap.  The 1 hour nap ended in stupid nightmare, so any rest I was gonna get out of that hour is gone.

Tomorrow I go for my weekly blood test.  It was every 2 weeks, but Dr Alkhateeb moved it to every week.  He really is concerned I am going to run out of platelets.  So off I will go to the Cancer Center in Clive and let them vampire me again.  Hoping that my platelets are at least 14.

Teresa is washing/rewashing all of my clothes.  Specifically the clothes I am taking with me to Rochester.  She got HE sensitive skin, no smell super detergent to wash the clothes in.  I think she is being a bit paranoid about the clothes, but hey, I am not doing the laundry, if she wants to rewash my clothes, who am I to say no.  I just occasionally have to help get clothes out of the washing machine and occasionally have to carry the clothes from the dryer to the folding place.   Easy Peasy

All the clothes I am taking SHOULD fit in my big suitcase.  I have a small suitcase backup just in case, just not sure where I would fit it in the car.  Things are really going to be that tight.  One small suitcase might just be too much.  But I am champion of making stuff fit.  I will get EVERYTHING that we need packed into the Dart.

Yesterday I spun a Pokestop and it gave me 19 items.  The most either of us had ever gotten before was 11.  LOL.  Stuff just kept popping up on my screen.  Included in that was another up-grade piece to upgrade Porygon.  I haven’t seem a Porygon in a long time (well, since we started playing Pokémon Go about 2 years ago.  Anyhow, if I ever see more and catch them, I am ready to upgrade 2 of them.

Speaking of upgrades, I need to go out and get max or close to max level Pokémon that I have even candy to upgrade them.  I have probably enough candy to upgrade 12 marginal Pokémon.  I would like them all the be close to max power.  So when we go out Pokehunting tonight, I will be on the special lookout for the ones I can upgrade.

My back has been hurting a bit more lately.  I quit the Flexeril do to side effects.  Now, I have some pain pills (Norco) for when I gets bad.  But I don’t like taking those either.  So most of the time I am just living with the pain.  It sucks, but hey it could be worse, I could have cancer, oh wait, I do have cancer, so maybe it can’t be worse.

My red blood cells are smaller than normal.  This has caused concern in Dr. Alkhateeb.  He thought it was a vitamin B6 deficiency but I am taking B6 and have been for a while and the cells haven’t grown.  This is why Dr. Alkhateeb thinks I might need chemo after the transplant, at least partly that is.  Suckage.

In case I have not made this clear, I do not want chemo after the transplant.  I just want to go to the transplant house and serve me 100ish days.  But that’s probably not going to happen, I’m probably going to get a couple rounds of chemo after the transplant has taken hold.  So, it won’t happen right after transplant, probably a month or so after transplant would be my guess.  Still suckage.

Heh, it’s one week before we want to leave.  I’m pretty sure we’ll be ready.  I just need to get Mayo to send us something officialish to make Teresa happy.  I’ll message them when I get done here and ask for that something officialish.  Everything else is falling into place.  Just no word, is not good word in this case.  And it seems like since the beginning with Mayo we have had problems with getting the word from them.   But that is another rant.

I’m gonna go now.  I really need to calm down.  So here is Queen in drag.

Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 50 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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