deja vu all over again

I did go back and redo the lessons I couldn’t do before in my web development class.  It’s deja vu hearing the words again, like haven’t I heard this before?  But working thru the lessons and actually doing the assignments is helping me understand better.  So it’s a good thing.  I will get back to where I was (100 or so lessons to go) in a few days (like by the beginning of next week).  It’s all good, still not in a rush (yet).  I really like the class, I just wish she didn’t go so fast.  I pause and copy more than I do, if that makes sense.  Cuz if I don’t pause she is already on to the next thing.  Heh.


Well, so much for the heatwave.  It’s 18 right now.  Still want to go to lunch with Drew, probably not going to happen as he has the only wheels and his wife has jury duty.  So Drew has to wait for her to call to come get her.  So we are going to have to reschedule for next week, Monday and Tuesday look nice.


The weather prediction for Wednesday changed again, now they are saying freezing rain all day.  Don’t really care unless it’s windy too.  Teresa is an excellent driver and will get me to Mayo and back in one piece with no worries.


Day after tomorrow is Mayo day, which includes a bone marrow biopsy and a handful of visits with the pharmacist, nurse, and Dr. Alkhateeb after the bone marrow biopsy.  Silly scheduling, I’m gonna be hurting by the time I see the doctor.  But I guess someone has to get the earlier appointments to have the biopsy done.   Not worried about the biopsy at all, worried about the blood test results.  If the blood test results are bad, they will be the second indicator (the blood tests 3 weeks ago was the first) that something is seriously wrong.  And be a strong sign that my bone marrow biopsy results will be bad.  Which is what we really don’t want.


Deciding to cancel my D&D games feels right.  My players are upset about it, but they understand that my health issue is eating away at me, keeping me from being able to put my heart into the games.  Anxiety is a pain in the ass, and I got enough anxiety in me for three people.  And the other thing was, I was bored with D&D.  Simple as that.  I will probably, more than likely get back into it.  But right now, I don’t want to play D&D at all.  The exception to that statement would be Cori’s game if it ever happens.  I will play in Cori’s campaign, because she is one of my closest friends and is a new DM who needs supportive players.


The thing is, it’s not just D&D, I don’t want to play Role Playing Games right now, in general.  I’m sure I could find another online game of something, but I’m just not interested in playing anything.  I’m just not feeling it right now.


I’m still stealing pics from a wiki.  That is what I can do which doesn’t cost anything (but time) and furthers my idea.  I don’t want to spend any more money on the idea until I find out if I am gonna be able to do it, meaning that my biopsy is good.  I have the gut feeling that my idea is going to be squashed though.  I’m pretty sure my blood tests are gonna be bad, and my biopsy is gonna be bad, and my idea will be squashed.  Not trying to be a downer, but I’ve always claimed to be a realist, and the way I see it, its not good.  BUT, the first blood test could have been an anomaly, and I could be fine.  Heh.


Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 49 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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