It just is what it is.

I just dropped all my classes for Summer Session and Fall Session.  I have decided I am not going to school after all.  Many factors came into play in this decision, but the big thing was to quit before I spent more than 15 dollars on school.  I thought long and hard about this decision and came to the conclusion that I would just screw it up again and be a drop out again.  Heh, I beat the rush this time.   Seriously, I think I could have done it, but I am not willing to go into the financial investment to test that theory.   I don’t feel bad about this decision.  I don’t feel good about this decision.  I don’t feel much of anything about this decision.   It just is what it is.


Turns out I may have steroid toxicity.  According to Dr. Google, lip tremors (which I am currently experiencing) are caused by being on steroids for too long at too high of a dose.  I am calling Chris today to see if I can get in for a blood test.  Chris noticed the tremors last time I was in his office, I blew it off as a lithium reaction, I didn’t realize what he meant.  Then Teresa noticed them, and she Googled lip tremors and one thing led to another and I am going to see Chris today.  —-  I have been on steroids of one form or another for over a year.  I need to come off them.


My cough, one minute it sounds a lot better, the next it sounds a lot worse.   Taking a Nebulizer seems to help the most.  Inhaler doesn’t do jack.  I cough all day every day, just not continual.   It goes from a light dry cough during the day to a wet nasty semi-productive cough at night.  Going to start my Advair again tonight and go back into full asthma treatment and see if that helps.   It can’t hurt.

My knee still only hurts when I bend it or when I kneel on it or put pressure on it.  So I am calling the knee better.  Yup, at least something physically is getting better for me.  It sucks getting old.


Teresa made tacos for dinner last night.  Quick and easy.  I am not a huge fan of hamburger tacos and hard shells, but it was quite tasty actually.  I personally prefer pork tacos with Baca Taco Sauce.  It’s a Region thing.  Teresa, being from California, doesn’t understand the pork tacos.  She is used to Taco Bell’s tacos.  So that is what we have for the most part.  Oh well, beggars can’t be choosers, so I will eat what she makes and be happy for it (except corned beef and cabbage, will NEVER eat that).


Skyrim:  I spent all day yesterday playing a wood elf archer.  Another new concept for me, she had never used a melee weapon.  I suck at shooting people in melee with me.  I can never get the shot to hit, I think I am aiming too low.  Anyhow, she is currently following Cicero’s blood trail in the Dawnstar Sanctuary.  I forgot to save and died in there and went all the way back to way before when it loaded.  So, I am not sure if I am going to keep her or not.  She is woefully low on healing potions and I don’t know if I can get thru all the ghosts.  But I will try.

Still have the Argonian, the Orc, and the Khajitt to play too.

I am having so much fun with Skyrim again.  I had originally bought it on a whim.  Paid 19.99 for it off steam.   Worth every penny and then some.  It was fun when I first played it.  It was fun when I second played it.  And it’s fun now on the third go around and I know more about what I am doing each time.  For it’s day, it had cutting edge graphics, now they look a little dated, but that gives the game some charm.  So, I am going to keep playing it until something new and better comes along, play that for a while, then probably go back to Skyrim for another run.  I like Skyrim.


I woke up this morning at 5 with my back hurting.   I am going to end up taking a pain pill here shortly cuz it still hurts.   I repeat that it sucks getting old.   Aches and pains are the norm.  You live with them and go about your merry way.   I just wish I had a few less aches and pains than I do.


Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 49 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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