It makes for a long morning when you wake a 4:30am.

Still having problems sleeping.  Went to bed at 10:45pm and woke at 4:30am.   I WANT desperately to sleep in on the weekends, but I can’t anymore than I can sleep normal during the week.  This lack of sleep is happening while I take Restoril every night.  Most peculiar, most annoying.  I just want my good sleep back to go with my good mood.  I am so desperate for good sleep, I am going to call and get a new set of masks for my CPAP and try that again.  It’ll be an interesting experiment to see if it helps.  It really can’t hurt my sleep, so what the heck.  Mayo sleep people get a call tomorrow.

My good mood continues.  It was a long month and a half of depression, but I got through it and now I am back to Happy Hectic.   My bipolar whilst medicated is strange.   I do not really go MANIC manic, I only do hypomanic and the occasional doom and gloom depression.  But the depressions usually don’t last very long, so they are a nuisance and not a problem.  This last depression was doom and gloom but not stomp on me bad.  I am thankful for that.  But it did lead me to finding a new shrink.

New shrink, Dr. Eastin, appointment is July 2nd at 11am.  Teresa is going with me.  We are going to fight to keep my meds the same.  Most psychiatrists do not like Nimodipine because they have never heard of it.  Well, tough cookies, I swear by it and do not want to come off it.  So, Teresa is going along to help me reason with this Dr. Eastin.  I started on Nimodipine in 2004.  That is more than 25 years of being on the med.  It works 90% of the time to keep me stableish.  As good as, if not better than, any mood stabilizer out there.  Hopefully Dr. Eastin will see the logic in keeping me on it or I will have to find yet another psychiatrist.  It only took 6 months to find him.

I still cough, but not nearly as much as I did.  Prilosec has helped immeasurably.  Going to a pulmonologist would have been a waste.  Getting a Pulmonary Function Test would have been a waste.  So, I am glad that Dr. Alkhateeb’s team listened to me and didn’t make me go through those.  Between them and the depression, I didn’t do crap for myself medically for a month or so, except take my meds, got to stay med compliant as much as possible.  Anyhow, a gastroenterologist might be in order here fairly soon; I would like to verify that I have GERD again.  I don’t know why I care considering the Prilosec works… but I want to know.   We are about to hit our max out of pocket with our insurance, so the gastroenterologist won’t cost us anything, not the visit, not the tests.  So there is really no reason not to do it.

I forgot to ask Dr. Alkhateeb about my planter’s fasciitis surgery this visit.  Too much OTHER stuff going on.  But I will remember at one of the visits.    You can count on that.  I want to be able to walk barefoot again.   I want to stop wearing those stupid lifts in my shoes.  I want to not have pain in my foot anymore.  If Mayo Orthopedic can do a minimally invasive surgery and make those things happen, I am ALL FOR IT.  Just have to get Dr. Alkhateeb’s ok.  Well, I already got his ok once, with the caveat that I be done with the treatment for MDS.  Well, technically I think I am done with the treatment for MDS.  I am in between Baby Shots.  I get my next set July 12th.  Then in September, then the final set in December.

Yes, the next Mayo visit is July 12th.  I have to get ahold of them and fix the scheduling.  They have us coming in at 7:30am again.  I KNOW now that we can come in at 11am.  So, why in the hell are they scheduling us so early?

Skyrim:  My newest Orc Warrior has done most of the game now.  I am collecting the Stones of Barenziah now.  I didn’t use a checklist, so I will have 23 of 24 when I think I should be done.  I don’t know which one I didn’t get.   I have memories of getting them all from other characters, so it’ll mean going back over all the stone spots and finding out which ones I missed.  BLAH.  But she is, in no particular order, Dragonborn, Arch-Mage, Harbinger of the Companions, Guild Master of the Thieves Guild, Leader of the Dark Brotherhood (assassins guild), member of house Tevanni (Solsteim), and general adventurer.  She is currently level 44 I believe.  She wields a wicked Warhammer and has killed an elder dragon in 1 hit with said wicker Warhammer.  She just hit 100 in 2 handed weapons and I am hoping to hit a level to get the top tier of perks for 2 handed weapons which I believe is chance for paralysis on a hit.  I am having a lot of fun with her, when she finishes with the Companions (curing Farks and Vikas, getting the 3 relics for Aela), it will finally be time to start that Dawnguard stuff..  Should start it around level 45.  The head Vampire is going to be a tough bastard in the final battle, but she will prevail.  Then I will probably do the Skyrim political thing, siding with the Empire even though I killed the Emperor as the last assassination of the Dark Brotherhood quests. Heh.  It’s all good, maybe I will make her 2 handed LEGENDARY and see if she can still kill most things with 1 hit.  Even without an enchant on her weapon she is doing 164 points of damage (plus crits).

I need a new game though.   A non-mmo RPG.  I don’t know if anyone is making a game that fits that order.  MMORPGs are still big bucks, so I don’t know if anyone is making any game similar to Skyrim for the PC.  I will have to look into this.

Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 50 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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