I give up, in this post is what is going on with me

Yeah buddy, I really do like my new glasses.  We just picked them up.  Well, a couple hours ago, but still just got home.  They are stylish and younger than my old glasses.  I am very happy with these Oakleys.  Would have probably felt silly had I bought the other pair I was looking at.   These are really nice glasses.

Tooth stopped hurting last night, now it’s not going to hurt until Monday morning when Dr. Matta (my dentist) rips the old crown off to put a new (temporary one) on.  Looking forward to it and not looking for to that at the same time.

Finally picked up the knee brace that the Dr. Kenney recommended.  Haven’t put it on yet cuz literally we just got home with it.  Hopefully this will help my knee feel better.  He said that they work for about 50% of people and in the past when this knee hurt, bracing it did help.  So, we bought a new brace cuz we couldn’t find one of my old braces and it will go on tomorrow.

OK, I give up, I am gonna share my bad news so there is no question as to what is going on.  My blood numbers that they track are all falling, my platelets in particular.  Platelets dropped over 50 points in a week.  Not a good sign.  Enough dropping of numbers to get Dr. Alkhateeb worried enough to order a bone marrow biopsy, which happens on the 26th.  We get the results on August 2nd.  Two trips to Mayo we weren’t supposed to have to make.  We had finally gotten up to 2 months between visits, but then this drop happened.  SUCKAGE.  Well, I am not taking the idea of potentially having cancer again very well, neither is Teresa.  Symptomwise, I am sleeping a whole heck of a lot.  Tired all the time.  I got some sun, so I am tan so you can’t tell if I am pale or not.  But the tiredness and sleeping are very AMLish.  So, anyhow, the Bone marrow biopsy will tell us within a week if its cancer again.  And am not going to dwell on this until it’s time to get the results.

I love my CPAP, the sleep I am getting from it is top notch.  As long as I remember to plug in all the black tubes, everything is golden.  It’s just uncomfortable, it digs into my face.  The medium is just plain too small, and the large is just plain too big, never getting a good seal.  Heh, maybe it is time to look at other masks, perhaps there is an alternative to medium and large standard masks.  I will look into this.

When I woke up this afternoon/evening I had no plan to go out.  Then my phone went off with texts saying the our glasses were ready.  So, I tagged along for a trip to Walmart, then lenscrafters, then PF Changs, then HyVee.  About 3 hours of being out when you start exhausted, is exhausting.  I told Teresa I was going to bed the minute I got home, but I felt I need to share what I shared.  So I wrote the blog entry first.  I am going to bed real soon though.

It literally just dawned on me that my tooth extraction is the day I was supposed to start DMing The Hole at Mayhem Comics and Games.  Well, that’s not going to happen now.  I plan to take a pain pill or two and go about the rest of my day doing nothing.  The Hole will have to wait a week or two.

Aravas isn’t going to run this week, cuz I want EVERYONE there for next session, and Nick has said he probably won’t be able to make it… something about pouring a bridge.  He gave me plenty of notice though, so it’s all good.  Jason has agreed to do a one shot.  I would, of course, rather un Aravas, but I will have fun, Jason is a good DM.

I didn’t get to watch the ROH PPV tonight cuz I was out running around with Teresa, and she will always win. Good news is its on Honorclub online and I can watch it tomorrow.

Oh yeah, I have made some decisions about my health that I haven’t ran by Teresa or Dr. Alkhateeb.  I am sure they will go over like a lead balloon.  But I don’t want the DLIs.  And I flat out refuse more chemo.  So if cancer is back, I am a walking Dead Man.  It’ll just be a matter of time.  I’ve lived longer than expected already, so this does not upset me.  I just want to die pain free and quickly at the end.

Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 50 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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