Whats on my mind while waiting

Greetings on this sure to HOT and Muggy August, 23, 2020. Yes, its supposed to get feels like temps in the 100s here, temp should 96 and then throw in humidity. Glad its a Sunday so I do not have to go anywhere or do anything outside. Its 70something degrees at 7:50am, its gonna be ridiculous today.

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I’ve been up since 6:30am, but that’s not bad I went to bed around 11 and slept right thru. So, whereas it would have been nice to sleep in, all the meds I have to take starting a 6:30am it wakes me up. Plus on the weekends I take care of the doggies morning stuff. So that wakes me up even more. No worries though, I can nap any time I am feeling tired. Teresa doesn’t complain about my napping anymore. Go figure.

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I have felt rotten since about 2 hours after I got the blood on Friday. I can’t really explain how I feel. Just don’t feel right. I know the blood they gave me was the right stuff, so its not that. I don’t know why I don’t feel good. The 2 units of blood should have made me feel “Normal” but instead I feel like crap. I feel like I know that the blood is being used up really fast. I may go get a CBC like Tuesday just to check that I have enough hemoglobin to make it to my appointment on Thursday. On Thursday I am sure I will need blood.

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Hoping to get the Bone Marrow Biopsy results tomorrow. It’s gonna be bad news no matter which news it is. So, I just want to know. I’m a big boy, I can handle it. Whatever news comes down, it will probably put me in the hospital at Mayo. That I do not want to happen. I don’t want to die in a hospital but if I have to I want to die at Mercy. Seriously, a hearse ride from Mayo to a Crematorium here would cost a fortune. Yup, listen to me, I am being frugal.

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Dr. Alkateeb gets back from his vacation tomorrow, supposedly her was informed of the situation while on his vacation. That would suck, here you are relaxing and you get a message from work about your patient who is in distress, and that the other docs at Mayo think I should be hospitalized. I’m going to apologize to him for not keeping him fully informed of what was going on while it was going on. That was my bad, big bad. I should have been messaging him from the first day my hemoglobin dropped and my platelets went wonky. It just all happened so fast. 4 or 5 weeks. And I didnt send him a single message during that time cuz Dr. Wehbe was taking care of me.

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Dr. Alkhateeb will at a minimum ask we come up to Mayo so he can check me out himself. We (Teresa and I) have decided we aren’t going to Mayo unless he is going to do something besides just talk to us. It is a long drive to just have a check up. I need another reason to trek that far. And once I am there, they’ll probably want to keep me, but I am not ready for hospital life again.

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First things first, I need the results of the Bone Marrow Biopsy. That will tell me all I need to make any future decisions. So we wait.

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Author: Jeff Campbell

I am 50 year old guy, who beat blood cancer but is getting his butt kicked by bone marrow cancer. At this point it appears I am dying. Married and in love with the most wonderful woman in the world (27 years). She has stood by me thru a lot of crap and I love her so.

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