Good morning Starshine, The Earth says Hello

Getting up at 5am tomorrow to get to showered and dressed, Teresa is getting up at 5:30.  This is to get to the hospital by 7am.  The hospital is pretty much in the center of Des Moines, and it takes a good 40 to 45 minutes to get there.  We will be going before traffic, which will be good.  My biopsy is scheduled for 8:30am.  Yes, it take 1 1/2 hours to get registered and have the blood draw and tested and get all prepped for the biopsy.  Once the biopsy starts it takes about 5 minutes, but I will be doped up for another 45 or so.  They give you good drugs so you don’t hurt when they do it, but when those drugs wear off the site of the biopsy is really achy.  And it remains achy for 3 days.  Hopefully this will be the LAST biopsy I get for a long while.  But I thought that about the biopsy I had 4 months ago.  Oh well, better safe than sorry.

By the way, I have no other symptoms of leukemia, not paler than usual and my energy level is pretty normal.  So, it is just my platelets that is warranting this biopsy which is the exact same reason that I had the biopsy 4 months ago (which was normal).


Winter is supposed to arrive this week.  63 high today, 65 high tomorrow, 37 high on Tuesday, then downhill from there.  Even a chance of a “lite” snow on Friday.  My chemo destroyed system does not like being cold, doesn’t like being hot either (but I have no worry about that right now).  I have a big thick winter coat that is supposed to keep me warm down to 30 below, it does a decent job on what it covers but damn my legs and feet get cold.  Need to find my gloves, hat and scarf.  Yeah, I have become a weather wimp, I am ok with that.  If I ever win a lot of money, I am moving away from IOWA and its extreme weather.


My mood has improved.  Still on the low side, but much better than I was before my vacation and better than I was yesterday.  So with the winter coming, my mood gets better.  It’s just fall that sets me off; September, October and November.  The depression does sometimes hang around thru December if the weather doesn’t turn (last year for instance).  So come on winter, I am almost ready for you 😛

 


 

I thought I had lost the key to my wife’s car.  However, it turns out she borrowed it cuz she lost hers.  It costs 250 dollars to replace said key, ick ack yuck.  I thought mine disappeared at the funeral.  Shows how much driving I do, she borrowed the key on Tuesday and I didn’t notice til Friday.  Anyhow, I went thru the hassle of calling our car repair people to find out how much it was to make another key.  Then Teresa told me she borrowed it after I told her I called to get a replacement key made.   DOH.  Her key is somewhere in the house.


I have been trying to play computer games, Civ4 Warlords, the old standby isn’t getting me interested.  I get to where oil is discovered and just bail.  I own Civ5 and Civ6.  Civ5 is just plain weird, and Civ6 might be too complicated for my poor feeble brain.  I have thought of getting back into Skyrim, I had a lot of fund playing Skyrim, but that’s not pulling me in either.  Age of Empires and Age of Wonders, age of not interested right now.  I don’t know what is up in my head.  I used to be a gaming junky and now all I seem to do is read Facebook and post blog entries.  Gonna have to force myself to play something seriously and get back into computer gaming.  Oh yeah, I forgot, I have been playing a little bit of World of Warcraft.  But even that isn’t really interesting me much.  Pet Battles with my new Troll hunter and Garrison stuff with Ughughkill.


My back has been feeling better, not well but better.  I am not hurting as much when I wake up.  That can mean 2 things, my back IS getting better now that I am moving around a lot more or I have learned to sleep as to not cause the back to hurt as much.  Either way, I still take a Flexeril every morning.  And I very rarely have to resort to my pain pills of which I have about 10 left.  When I see Dr. Ransdell, we are gonna have a long talk about pain and how nothing he has tried or had me try is working.   Plus the shot he gave me in the neck region has worn off, so I am back to having pain across my entire back, not just the mid/lower parts.


My desk is a mess.  Teresa says I never throw anything away, and that is why I come across like a slob.  And as I look around the desktop, I got a lot of junk on my desk that needs to be pitched.  Perhaps that will be my project for later today.


I hope I am wrong

Today was a sad day.  I found out that a friend of mine who I have neglected recently passed away 2 days ago.  I’ve told people before that I totally suck at being a 3D friend, no one believes me.   Well anyhow, tomorrow is the funeral, I am going.  He was the only friend who came and visited me while I was in the hospital, so being at his funeral is the least I can do.  We didn’t talk often, we weren’t buddy buddy, but I feel I need to do this.  I don’t like funerals and I know nothing about Jewish funeral services, but hey, first time for everything I guess.  The world lost a great guy though.


I actually remembered it was Thursday and attended the Acute Leukemia chat for a bit tonight.  This I haven’t done in several weeks.  Most of the regulars were there.  I just didn’t feel up to chatting much so I made up some lame excuse and left after a half hour or so.  I did get a bunch of sympathy from them about my platelets.  I’m not sure that is what I need or want.  I just want this to be over and get my life back to “normal”.


I also went to Edwina’s Bipolar Chat for a bit tonight, something I haven’t done in several months.  That was directly because of my friend’s passing.  I needed to make sure they knew, which they did.  I should have known they knew, probably one of the first groups of people who were informed.  Chat was a big part of his life.


So, I have been fretting over the D&D game and getting our characters into roll20.  Well, our DM has decided we aren’t putting our characters into roll20.  He “trusts” us.  Which is cool.  We are starting at level 4, not like we have super-powers or mega-weapons so there isn’t a whole lot we need to inform the DM of.  So the game tomorrow night is on.  6:30pm my time, giving me time to have dinner, which is a good thing.  Otherwise I wouldn’t eat til like 10pm, which would suck.

I am very much looking forward to this game.  I haven’t been a player in a game in a long time (I am not counting the 2 sessions of 3.5 D&D I played right before getting diagnosed with leukemia).  It’s been over 25 years since I played any role playing game as a player.  And my regular readers will remember that I killed the 2 games I was running as a DM very recently.  I’m ready to be a player.  I’m sure I can be a great player.  Oh yeah, I forgot the 3 sessions I played (as a player) with Jon.  So, I have been a player in recent history, but for only 3 sessions, does that really count?  Anyhow, I am ready to play in a big campaign with lots of things going on and that is what I have been promised.


I am still dealing with depression.  I still can’t bring myself to play any computer games or really read anything.  So I sit around all day on Facebook and entering Publishers Clearing House contests.  I lead a boring life.


I realized today that I have been over a year doing absolutely nothing of value.  I am a bum.  I want to change that.  At least start doing more things around the house.  Don’t know if I am ready for laundry, but dishes perhaps, and picking up after myself.  Yeah, I should be able to do that.  All this idea, requires me being healthy enough to do it.  So, my wanting change won’t come about for a while I guess.  But dammit, I am gonna try eventually.


Found out today that the hospital wants me there at 7am on Monday and not 7:30.  It’s a 40-45 minute drive to the hospital.  UGH, gonna be waking up way early on a Monday. It could be worse, I could have had to be there at 5am for the 6:30am biopsy.  But it’s all good, I will be there on time and go thru the hoops that they make me go thru and be to the radiology department on time.


I think this biopsy is #8 or #9.  I got a lot of holes in my hip bone.  It’s all good, I don’t think there is a limited number of holes you can have in your hip, well I am sure there is a limit, but I think its a huge number being as it’s a big bone.


Sorry, this isn’t a video.  It is just the song I wanted to post the other day.  The video is too weird for words, so just kick back for 5ish minutes and listen to Dutch Singer Do (yeah, DOH) sing to DJ Sammy’s music.


Here, a list I pretty much agree with.  I like WatchMojo, their lists are interesting if nothing else.

Of Black Friday and Medical Crap

We shopped on Black Friday but we didn’t leave our house.  All the presents were downloads from either the Playstation store or Steam.  So, needless to say, Teresa and I have already given each other our gifts.  Well, she got what she wanted, I got what I wanted.  And she does have a Nintendo Switch on the way (she ordered that before we left to come home, no clue when it’s supposed to arrive).  It’s all good getting the brunt of Christmas done early.  The only other 2 people I buy for are my brother and mother, and they both wanted gift cards from Amazon (well that is what mom wants, I am just assuming brother will be cool with a gift card).  I always find something cool for my brother for his birthday in June.  So, basically I got 2 gift cards to go and I am DONE Christmas shopping.

In case you didn’t know, Christmas is a holiday I choose not to celebrate.  I am no longer Bah Humbug, but I am still not going to put up a tree or decorate or go around telling everyone “Merry Christmas”.  I just don’t dig this holiday.  I give gifts to 3 people, because I love them and they celebrate and expect gifts, and it’s not worth the fight.


While at my brother and mother’s house, I broke Mojo’s food bowl.  Didn’t mean to, it was at the foot on the bed and I rolled over and stretched knocking it off to the tile floor.  It was a total break.  So Teresa took Pucky and Mojo to Petsmart today (right now) to get Mojo a new bowl and probably some more stuff for them for Christmas.  I probably should have went to keep her from going nuts, but people at this time of year are not my thing.  So I stayed home.  —  She is picking up Applebee’s on the way home.


The D&D game I am joining is supposed to start this coming Friday, but none of us can figure out how to add our characters to roll20.  Something about needing the game masters permission, and our game masters is as clueless about it as the rest of us are.  I guess we have a few days to figure it out, but I hate waiting to last minute to get anything done, and entering our characters in for the first time is going to take a while I am sure.


I ordered an IPhone 8+ which should be here tomorrow.  It is to replace my overly flakey IPhone 7+.  I could have got the X, but I didn’t want to pay 20 bucks more a month to Sprint.  Instead the 8+ is only a dollar forty seven more.  Here’s to hoping that the 8+ is less of a pita than the 7+ has been.  The 8+ is not a Christmas present, it’s just a necessity thing before I utterly destroy my 7+ in frustration.


I miss my mom and brother pretty bad.  Like I have said before in this blog, it’s worse right after I see them.  Mom said she is going to try to come in February.  And then both of them are supposed to come at the end of March beginning of April for Teresa’s birthday (April 1st) and our 25th Anniversary (April 2nd).  I think if they are coming at the end of March, mom will call of her visit in February.  I will see them when I see them I guess.  All I know for absolute sure, is that I am going to be there on June 3rd (don’t have arriving and leaving dates yet) for my brother’s 50th birthday.  He only has one of those, so I have to be there for it.  And then again I will be there next November from the weekend before Thanksgiving til Thanksgiving.  Beyond that, nothing is certain as far as travel to see my family or my family coming to see me.


My mood is as weird as the weather here has been.  One minute I am deeply down and the next I am in a great mood.  I hate Ultradian cycling (ultra-rapid mood changes).  I’m not sleeping well cuz of my back (which I will get to in a minute).  That helps contribute to my weird moods.  The trip back to the Region and then coming back home could be contributing to my weird moods.  A lot of things going on could be contributing to my weird moods.  I just want to settle into a mood and stick with it for a while.


My back is really truly fubar now.  I sleep on my side.  I can only sleep for about 6 hours without pain.  I get up take a Flexeril, wait and hour and then try to go back to sleep.  Been doing this for a month or so now.  Really is a pita.  If I could sleep on my back again (haven’t been able to do such yet) I probably could sleep longer.  Anyhow, every morning I wake up in pain, and that sucks.  Then if I sit in my chair for 2 hours while the Flexeril gets a good grip, my back will hurt more because of that.  So I have taken to standing around, sometimes eating breakfast while I stand but mostly just standing around.  So, I sit for 1 hour or so, then stand for 1 hour or so, then go back to bed for a couple hours.  I don’t make any appointments in the morning cuz I am hurting too much.  It just sucks.


Dr Wehbe, my oncologist, is ordering another bone marrow biopsy.   I find out when it is tomorrow.  Then when I get those results, I will contact Mayo Clinic up in Minnesota.  They have the top rated Hematology department in the US.  So I figure I will give them a shot at figuring out why my platelets are low and fixing said issue.  Dr Wehbe has tried everything I have found online to try, so time to go to the blood experts.   Gonna suck going up there in the winter.  But I gotta get better so I can stop being afraid


Heh, I haven’t been able to get the hang of fighting multiple Urog in Middle Earth:Shadow of Mordor.  It seems that every time I get past a group for 4 or more, I run into another group of 4 or more than kicks my butt.  I suppose it just takes practice and dying a lot to get better, but dang its frustrating right now.  I suppose I have to give it more than a day and a half but still.  It’s more frustrating that Teresa kicks serious butt in her game Horizons: Zero Dawn and I am still on training wheels in mine.


D&D, Bone Marrow, and getting out of here

Heya, some of you might notice the new banner.  I replaced the Gnolls with Yuan-ti.  Yuan-ti are to be my new arch enemies in the new D&D game I will be playing in starting the week after Thanksgiving.  I am really looking forward to playing this game. Danny really is putting a lot of work into it.  My Ranger’s backstory fits in perfectly with what Danny has compiled, so it’s all good.  Can’t wait to get started.


Went to see Dr Wehbe (my cancer doc) today, platelets have stalled out at 30.  Supposed to be 150 to 450.  He has no clue as to why my platelets are so low.  He is going to order yet another bone marrow biopsy after I get back from vacation.  I really don’t think it’s leukemia again.  I don’t know what to think it is.  Just sucks having platelets so low.  Anyhow, he is all for us going to Mayo Clinic up in Minnesota and having them take a run at fixing my platelet problem.  When I mentioned Mayo Clinic, he was all for it, he is really the befuddled.


Therapy yesterday went fairly well.  We talked mostly about what is bothering me the most, which is my platelet issue.  My therapist’s husband got AML shortly after I went into remission.  So she has more of a clue as to what I am going thru than your average therapist would have.


We are leaving for the Region in a couple hours.  It’ll be good to get the heck out of here and forget my problems for a week.  OK, I won’t forget them, just won’t be sitting at home thinking about them.  Portage, specifically, has changed so much, but somehow it still feels like going home.  And getting to see mom and Jim are just bonus.


Thanksgivingfest (one word, not two like some people write it), is Saturday.  Cakes are all set to be picked up between 10:30 and 11.  The party itself will go from noon to midnight or so.  With food being served at 1 o’clock and munching happening all the rest of the time.  I know I have said it before, but I look forward to Thanksgivingfest every year.  It’s my only chance to see the Gang every year.  Now not all of the Gang show up, but enough to make it feel good to hang out with your best friends who are family.


Lunch the day after has been cancelled.  Much to the bummer.  Shawn and Andi are both going out of town.  It’s all good, it’ll give me a chance to get back to the Region at a reasonable hour.  So, I will only be in the Indy area Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday morning.  That is fine.  Gives me more time with mom and Jim in the Region.


Taking 2 laptops, maybe 3 with us.  I am taking 2 myself and I believe Teresa is taking her old work mac laptop.  She might have to work tonight after we get to the Region.  That would SUCK.  She really needs a vacation more than I do.   She works way too hard and way too much.  She needs to get away from her phone and just chill for a while.  I worry about her.

My new laptop is going so we can play WoW.  My old laptop is going so I can check Facebook and play Civ4 Warlords while Teresa plays WoW.  My old laptop will go with me down to Fishers (Indy) so I can show Cori the cook little program I use to make characters for D&D.  My old laptop still works, just takes 10-15 minutes to boot.


I guess I need to finish packing and help with all the other stuff we have to get ready to go.  Us going somewhere for a week is a big production.  Bigger than it should be, especially with Teresa taking a bunch of cooking stuff since “she is cooking Thanksgiving”.  We are gonna jam a lot into our little Dart.


Oh what a pain in the… (revisited)

So much back pain, and no appointment until almost Christmas at my pain doctor’s office.  They have me on the will call if something opens up, but with the holidays coming everyone in pain is looking for relief, myself included.  The shot in the neck he gave me in August has totally warn off.  The rest of the back is still totally thrashed.  I can force myself to sit, but sitting is what causes my back to flare up.  Can’t stand all the time, can’t always be sprawled in bed either.  Doesn’t just kinda sucks, it totally sucks.


Yup, I am definitely driving down to Thanksgivingfest and lunch the day after.  Would love to fly, but 1. too costly and 2. the times don’t work for me.  So, I will drive the 3 1/2 – 4 hours down to Fishers Indiana, home of Bruce and Cori.  It may take me 6 to 7 hours as I plan to take a lot of breaks to just stretch my back.  But I am gonna make it.  I will just catch a ride with Bruce and Cori over to Sam’s house for actual Tfest on Saturday.  Then Sunday I will leave right after lunch with Shawn and Andi and anyone else they bring along or show’s up.  Again, it’s 3 1/2 – 4 hours with minimal stops, I don’t think my back will hold up for minimal stops, so think lots of stops.  But I am gonna do this.


My mood is going up and down.  It seems I want to be happy while SAD is bringing me down.  Rapid Cycling is the result.  World of Warcraft is being a great diversion.  Waiting for Teresa to say she is ready to play our characters that have already started together into Legion.  I think she wants to, but she doesn’t want to disturb me while I am already playing other characters.  Guess I will have to let her know I’ll drop the other character’s to level Pugno on the horde side, and Quash on the Alliance side.  Either one would make me happy.


I started characters on the Dalaran server as a diversion, but I am enjoying the guilds I have joined.  Well, I have 3 horde characters, 2 guilded who are leaving their guild tomorrow, and I have 6 alliance characters. 3 guilded to different guilds, 1 hunter who I using as a guild sig monkey, and a warlock I just started tonight who is unguilded at this point.  Of the 3 guilds that my 3 alliance are in, I have no idea which I like better.  The first one, my fury warrior was given 3 2500gp bags as then treated real nice by everyone.  My Pally joined a family feeling guild, which I totally love.  My Rogue joined a guild which seems to have welcomed me with open arms.  I really need to pick one.  I just don’t know at this time.


I haven’t even though of playing another game since getting back into WoW.  World of Warcraft is kind totally controlling.  I would say I am addicted, but I can quit at any time and not look back.  I do not have an addictive personality.  I am just a guy having fun with the game most of the time.  Yeah, having 9 characters doing the same stuff at basically the same time is kinda mind numbing, but maybe just maybe I need some mind numbing right now.  I did name my warrior HATE is Lithuanian when I was in a particularly down mood.  The rest of them have cool names.


I see my shrink next Friday and we are gonna discuss SAD again.  The lights don’t do jack for me.  For some people they are a miracle cure for SAD, for others, they are a really bright light source.  I fall into the really bright light source crowd.

I am gonna start walking again, hopefully starting tomorrow if I don’t come up with some lame excuse.  Exercise of the body is supposed to help again SAD too.  So my form of exercise is dedicated walking.  I got out of the habit a few months ago and now I am ready to get back to it.


Teresa bought Pucky and Mojo Chihuahua Stairs for the bed.  There is no more hearing Mojo scratch cuz he can’t time the jump to the next make shift stairs.  The funny thing is, these stairs can stand 200 pounds but they are billed as Chihuahua stairs.  That’s a lot of Chihuahuas.


 

I’m alone and it’s weird

It is quiet and lonely in the house this morning.  The dogs are at the vets, Teresa is at work, I am here, possibly for the first time ever, totally alone in my house (we have always had pets since we moved here).  It’s a weird feeling, I almost don’t know what to do with myself.  I don’t think being this alone is good for me.  Weird stuff is running thru my brain.


Teresa’s car needed a jump this morning.  We jumped it, I let it sit for an hour, even took it for a little drive around a couple blocks.  Teresa took my car to work.  After the hour, I turned the car off and it started right up.  I am like cool.  I shut it off again, then went inside for a while.  Did I mention it’s 43 degrees and raining fairly hard?  I went back out 20 minutes later.  Tried to start it, DEAD again.  Luckily we live only a few blocks from the place that fixes our cars and they are cool people.  Called them up and they sent a guy over with a jump pack to jump the car.   We jumped it real quick and then I drove it over to the repair place.  They then gave me a ride home after telling me they will check everything and give me a call with a price.  What a morning.  I am waiting now for said call.  Alone, in my home, having weird thoughts.


My lunch that was tomorrow, got moved to Thursday, but then I was reminded that I have a cancer blood check appointment on Thursday, so that rules Thursday out.  Friday is shrink appointment, so that rules Friday out, so we are now having lunch some time next week.  LOL, it’s ok, he is a good friend, we will get together.  It’s his turn to buy lunch anyway.


We actually turned the heat on last night (and its gonna probably stay on).  Cold and wet is most of the forecast ahead for the next week.  Thank the gods that the furnace didn’t have trouble again when we turned it on.  It’s all good when it works, but a couple times over the last several years the furnace has had problems with a little gizmo inside it.  Same part every time.  Heh.  The repair place for furnaces sends the same tech out every time and he had actually not charged us labor for the last time, he just walked in with the little gizmo and swapped it out and walked out like 3 minutes later.  It’s almost ridiculous.


The dogs were really nervous when we dropped them off this morning.  They always get nervous over visits to the vet.  But when the vet tech picked them off to take them to the back, they both got super nervous.  I don’t think Mojo has ever been taken back, and the last 2 times Pucky went to the back, he had knee surgery.  This time they are just having their teeth deep cleaned.  But that does take putting them under, so I’m a little nervous for them.  By now, they are probably done and in recovery.  Won’t know how it went til later this afternoon.  But for now, no news is good news.


The high-level D&D game starts back tomorrow night.  I posted what the Paladin detected as his last action last time.  The reactions have been humorous.  Undead to the right, Devils to the left, Vampire in the middle.  LOL, if they play it right, it’ll be a challenge but not impossible.  If they screw around, there will be a total party kill before they get to the final guys.  I nerfed every encounter a little bit, so they should be able to handle this.


The low-level D&D game starts back on Friday night.  This will be the final adventure of the story arc that actually started like 4 months ago.  It might even be delayed another week due to the player whose character is the main focus of the finale might have to give his daughter a birthday party thing on Friday night.  I really should ask him if that is the case so we can announce that the game will be postponed 1 week.  I don’t want to run this final part without him actually playing his character as his character has a significant role in this set of encounters.


Flexeril is still keeping my back feeling pretty good.  But I can’t seem to do any stretches without a lot of pain.  My physical therapist said that’s not good, so he told me to stop going to him.  So, I called my pain doctors office to get on the list to try to get a sooner appointment, right now I am set to see him December 22nd.  DOH.  Anyhow, I am now on the list, that’s good.  Plus they called me in a refill on my Flexeril, I don’t know if I am gonna be on it forever, but for now, it’s good to have a supply.  And the grumpy lady who answers the phone at the pain doc’s office was actually pleasant with me, I made her laugh, I’m good at that.


Blood check is Thursday morning.  I’m not looking forward to my platelets (and rest of blood levels) going down more.  I feel nervous enough about where the platelets are, I don’t need added stress about them going down more.  And like I mentioned before, no one but me is noticing the other stats are going down a little bit each month, not as noticeably as the platelets, but still it is happening.


Teresa just Skyped me that she is coming home in an hour or so and finishing the day from home.  Can’t say how happy I am that she is going to be here sooner as opposed to later.  She is still sick, she shouldn’t have went to work in the first place.  I’m sure that the workers around her are making her leave.  I’m not afraid of her germs, heck I’ve lived thru all of Teresa’s illnesses over the years and only got 1 worse than her, most I have somehow magically evaded them all, only feeling bad for a day or so compared to her 4 or 5 days of being SICK.


Gonna mention this here.  I am toying with the idea of trying school one more time.  Starting in the Spring.  January actually.  I filled out the FAFSA.  I have figured out a schedule.  I know I can’t do online in the summer.  But I think I could do in person during a real semester.  I still have to talk to Teresa about it, so PLEASE no one mention this to her.  I will bring it up when she is feeling better.  This is very much in the kicking around the idea stage.   I think I could do a real semester.  Not sure.  But dammit, I think I am gonna try.


Out with the old…

The old laptop has been replaced.  Not sure what I am gonna do with it.  It still does word processing and business stuff really well, just doesn’t and never has ran games well.   I am writing this blog post on my shiny new laptop.  It plays Civ4 like a champ.   Tomorrow, if I get some sleep tonight (HA HA), I will fire up Skyrim and give a dragon fight or two a go.  I really like this new laptop, its a Republic of Gamers Game Notebook Strix.  I am slowly transferring all my hardware over to ROG hardware, I really like the stuff they put their tag on.


Sleep has been elusive for the last couple weeks.  Stupid prednisone side effect.  My meds knock me out ok, but I am awake after 2 or maybe 3 hours.  Wide awake all day until my meds hit again at night.   So I am doing 21-22 hour days for over a week.  Makes for one tired, grumpy guy.  Hopefully when I come off the prednisone on Friday, I will be able to sleep on Sunday maybe.  I don’t know how long prednisone stays in the system…  With my luck, it’ll take a week to get out of my system and I won’t sleep even when not taking it.  Eventually my system will just shut down and I will SLEEP the sleep of the dead for like 36 hours.   I used to have really bad insomnia issues, I remember doing these kind of things and then crashing for a couple days.  Hopefully I come off prednisone and my body goes back to normal quickly.


Wife is worried that since I have a gaming laptop now, I will spend all my time in bed again.   I spent less than 5 hours in bed playing tonight, will she was home.   Beyond that all day I was on my desktop gaming system with the 34″ dual monitor setup.  I still prefer to game on that than this laptop and it’s 15″ monitor.  This laptop is primarily for when I go out of town, so my games can travel with me.  Or when Teresa is sitting in bed playing on her ipad, I will break out the laptop and spend time with her.  Otherwise, its gaming desktop all the way.


Can’t wait for mom to visit.  I really do not get to see her enough.  Now I will get a whole week with her, without the distractions of the Region.   Even though she thinks Des Moines is the single most boring place on the earth, I hope we can find some stuff to do together.  I’ll make her drive everywhere.   I don’t care to drive much anymore.


I had a twinge of back pain today.  I am on the minimum dosage of prednisone now, so the pains might be coming back.  That’ll mean physical therapy starting for me.  I don’t want to do physical therapy (AGAIN) but my pain doc won’t give me anything for the pain in the lower and mid back, so I will give physical therapy a real try this time.  I have never went into physical therapy for my back with the thought in my head that it should work.  This time, I am going in with the hope and thought that it is going to do what it is intended to do and strengthen my back so I am not in pain all the time.  I may add acupuncture to the back cocktail if physical therapy works.  Double the treatment Eastern Medical practice and Western physical therapy.  Best of both work perhaps?


Been too tired of late to play Skyrim.  Skyrim requires thought to a certain extent, and my mind is a terrible fuzzy wasteland right now.  So instead I have been playing Civ 4 Warlords.  I own multiple copies and all the DLC of Civ 5, couldn’t stand it.  Civ 6 looks interesting but I am not into how they changed combat.   It’s all right I guess, but I like Civ 4, build big stack of badness, go squash little stack of meekness, take city, laugh hard, rinse, repeat as necessary.


OK, I have talked about Music Choice on here before.  I discovered a new channel (new to me), the y2k channel.   They play 2000-2011 music.  The stuff I listened to on the radio cuz there was no classic rock station or because it offended Teresa less.  The dogs stepped on the remote and put it on one day and I didn’t even notice it was something different until a couple hours later.  It’s cool.


I am new to this blog stuff, I don’t know how often I am supposed to publish.  I went thru a phase where I published multiple a day or at least one a day, but that was when things were going on for me.  Now that I have accepted that I am to do much of nothing short of gaming for the rest of my life, there just isn’t a whole lot to say.  There is only so much you guys would want to hear about my low blood numbers and no hope of them improving.  Lots of stress there, but nothing about it has changed since the last 2 times I mentioned it.  Back pain going on was cool, now its coming back, not cool.  So forth and so on, lots of the SSDD for me, so I tend to save a bunch for a big post.


D&D will resume after my mom comes to visit and maybe after my mother-in-law’s visit.  Anyway, it is looking like the first week of October.  Yeah, long break again.   Sorry folks but it is how my life has went, severe depression, then anger, rage and general foul moodiness, the it will be too much pain to sit for 2 hours straight, then company staying at our house that I need/wamt to be attentive to.  D&D will resume just in time for my fall Seasonal Affective Disorder.  Yup, sucks to be waiting on me.  Sorry, so very sorry.


Oh, it is 10pm, time to take my nightly meds, sleep comes in a couple hours.   Then I will sleep for a couple hours, then I will be up playing some game or the other.   I am drag-ass tired, been this way for a while now, hope is in sight, just have to reach out for it.

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