Still hurting after all this time…

Pain is still the operative word of the day/week/month/months.  My back is still killing me.  I think on Monday I will call the pain doc’s office and double check that there hasn’t been any cancellations and I am still on the list.  The pain is getting worse.  All I really want is to be able to sit in a chair for 2 hours without a lot of pain.  I don’t think that is asking too much.  2 hours, 2 measly hours.

When I went to the pain doc in June, I had one point for trigger point injections.  Now I have like 6 spots on my back.  Easier to point on where it doesn’t hurt.  Plus my neck issue is acting up and its shooting pain down my right arm.  Grrr.  Pain sucks.  Sucks very much.  And it all started with one jerk who barely tapped my back bumper at a yield sign back in 1999.  Yup, for most of almost 20 years I have been in mild to severe pain, that is the back problem.  Not sure when I messed up my neck, possibly as far back as high school, so 30 years for that pain.

The first time I got trigger point injections they last 3 months.  This time the pain relief in that spot was 6 days.  Not good.  I am gonna end up back on pain meds, I just know it.  I am not happy about it, but if that is what it takes to get me to where I can sit, so be it.  So be it.


Pain was so bad tonight that I had to cancel my Friday night D&D game.  It was to be the final session of this story arc.  But no, I could not sit at my desk for 2 hours to run the game.  I just was hurting so bad.  I needed to be laying pretty much flat in bed, which is what I am doing now.  My laptop might be a POS, but it works for writing this blog when I can’t sit at the desk.


Mojo had a slight infection in both ears.  Got goop put into each ear and smeared around.  Was kind of expensive, but the little guy is worth it.  Next vet visit is for Pucky to have a deep teeth cleaning, one where they knock him out, he’s officially elderly now, he turned 7 on the 4th of July.  Beyond having his teeth cleaned they are gonna remove 2 loose teeth that aren’t/haven’t fallen out on their own.


I called to confirm with the movers for Monday morning.  The guy was all shocked that I called.  I guess no one else ever calls to make sure.  I also wanted to make sure to remind him that the place doesn’t open til 9:30.  I lost the keys to the lock, luckily the place I rent the storage locker at will cut locks off for customers as long as they have proper ID.  So it’s all good.


It’ll be cool to have nice furniture to set up on.  A big desk 72″x36″.  And the 2 cabinets and a bookcase.  I have a lot of stuff that needs to be stored.  Getting these pieces into the bedroom is going to be interesting.  Glad I am not the mover.  We just have to move them into place, once we figure out how the are gonna be placed.  For the desk and the printer cabinet we have a good idea of where they are gonna go.  So it just matters if the other cabinet and the bookcase will have enough room to sit side by side next to the desk. I think there is enough room, not sure.  I don’t remember exact measurements.  So its all gonna be put in place on the fly so to speak.


The remainder of the stuff from storage is going downstairs.  Not that there is a whole lot of space down there, but there really isn’t that much in storage after you remove the big furniture pieces.  A small fridge.  A toaster oven.  A 36″ round table (would have went in the bedroom, just ran out of room).  4 visitor chairs.  Probably a box or two.  A 4ft folding table.  I don’t remember much else.  The giant map of the world is going on the ugly wall here in the bedroom.  Basically anything else besides the earlier mentioned furniture and the map are going to the basement.  I guess this weekend I will go make some room down there when my back will let me.


I cancelled my therapy appoint, my shrink appointment, a dentist appointment and lunch with a friend so far cuz of this problem with my back.  Something has got to give.


Have I mentioned how much I love my wife lately?   Well, for the record, I love my wife.

While cleaning the back 40 we came across some old pictures of us and had a nice chuckle about how skinny we used to be.  LOL.  Oh so many years ago.  Now plump is the polite word for us.  But then again, most of us around my age are plump.


Disturbed’s – Sound of Silence.  It’s kind of my wife’s new go to song for testing anything electronic.  She got a new Bluetooth speaker for her Echo Dot.  She is testing it out in the bedroom, its 11:35 at night, we share a bedroom wall with our neighbor.  The song gets LOUD.   Teresa, I love her dearly, has little to not concept of how loud is loud.  I hope Gordy and his wife (whose name I have forgotten again) don’t complain about how loud it got tonight.


Speaking of Disturbed’s Sound of Silence, here ya go.

We did it…

Well, my mood improved drastically today.  Love when my mood cycles out of crap fast, a benefit of being Ultradian Bipolar.   Nimodipine, the med I take as a mood stabilizer actually slows down my cycling to a couple days from much less time.  No, you didn’t read it wrong, I said I am on Nimodipine, a calcium channel blocker, for mood stabilization.  I am like 1 in 3 in the US on it and we 3 really like it.  Works as good as lithium for me without the wicked side effects.

 


 

As I talked about yesterday.  We cleaned the rest of the “back 40″ today.  Only took 3 hours because we took some long breaks.  If we had fought straight thru it would have only been an hour and halfish.  I had forgotten just how big this room is.  Its like 20×20, if not more.  The biggest bedroom I have ever seen in a house this size.  So we are turning the back half into an office/crafting area.  Teresa’s computer setup has always been back here, my computer and stuff moved back a week or so ago.

Now we are ready to get movers to move the stuff from my storage unit to here.  It’ll be nice having a BIG desk again.  36″x72”.  With lots of storage on the desk.  Then the printer table has a  bunch more storage, plus the bookshelf.  Gonna have lots of places to put stuff.  Much nice then the hodgepodge of furniture I have available to me now.  A kid’s desk, 2 different nightstands and a cardboard box.  I have to store most of my D&D books across the room.  It will be nice to have them close at hand.


Teresa discovered I am not a packrat or a hoarder.  I am just lazy and don’t want to go thru the trouble of throwing stuff away.  She made the distinction today as she is a pack rat.  I am just one to throw stuff I am not using into a pile.  Not really caring if its useful or trash, then I forget that it even exists.  In my defense, I do have a mental disorder with a lot of idiosyncrasies, being lazy is just one of them.


I have been toying with changing the idea of my Sunday afternoon D&D game to make it a Saturday afternoon D&D game.  Just not sure at this time and that is ok, cuz its gonna be 3 or 4 week before I decide to start looking for players seriously.  Passively looking I think I have 1 already and to him it doesn’t matter which day.

Really do wish I could find an in-person game instead of running a 3rd online game, but hey gotta take what I can get.  I don’t get to the gaming stores very often (been a couple years, pre-leukemia) since I stepped into one.  Gaming stores are the only way I know how to get localish playing games.   Mayhem comics runs a onine bbs, but its not very active.  I am betting they have contact info in the store for gamers.  Just would have to get off my lazy butt and go down there and see, also Jay’s Hobbies and the new place I can’t remember the name of, they both sell gaming stuff, so they might have a list of players too.  Once I get my back fixed.


Speaking of getting my back fixed, still haven’t heard from the pain doc’s office about getting me in earlier.  August 17th is looking FAR away.


Hmmm, gotta figure out where to put my current setup when the movers bring the office setup in.  I am kinda in the way.  So is some of Teresa’s stuff for the matter.  Have a few days at least to think about disposition of the stuff.  Plus we desperately need to vacuum.


I can tell my platelets are still low, this bruise is taking FOREVER to go away.


And finally, for the record:  I LOVE MY WIFE.

200_s

Actually got off my butt and went out with Teresa this afternoon/evening.  She asked several times today if I was up to going to HuHot and I kept saying No.  Still really depressed, still in a lot of pain.  But come 4:10pm or so, I decided that going out is what I really needed to do.  So, out we went.

First stop was HuHot, was good as per usual.  Only complaint I had was the cook burned my noodles a bit.  Happens from time to time. Also though, the pain in the back got worse.  That happens from time to time too.

Second stop was Penzey’s Spices.  55 bucks for the smaller bottle of double strength Pure Vanilla seems excessive to me.  But hey, it is what Teresa wanted, so its all good.  Teresa also go whatever it is that makes pastrami, she plan to make some for me.  I love homemade pastrami, so I look forward to this.

Then we went to Office Depot, Teresa wanted a new shelf for the front closet.  Office Depot had exactly what she wanted for 10 dollars less than Amazon.  Go figure.  I guess sometimes it pays to shop around.  I got 2 new surge protectors for my computer, the ones I have are OLD and have long sense became power strips.  So now, when I get set up with my desk and everything, I will be set.

Last stop was HyVee (which is a grocery store for those that don’t know).  Why?  Cuz eggs were on sale for 69cents a dozen.  And we got some Adel Dierdorf corn, happen to be some of the smallest ears I have ever seen, but Dierdorf corn is gonna taste good anyway.  Teresa kept asking if there was anything I wanted, by this point I was still very full from HuHot and in a whole new dimension of pain.  So I said no to everything, I am sure I will regret that later.

All in all, my depression is better, my pain is worse but it’s getting better cuz the 6pm ibuprofen is kicking in.


We have decided to hire movers to move all the stuff from my storage unit to the house.  50sq ft storage 80% full.  Only took them 2 hours to move my stuff from my office to the storage unit, should take them less to move from the storage unit to my house as my house is a good 20 miles closer.  So with tip it should cost us about 250 bucks.   Not too bad if it keeps me from melting when the temperature goes up this week.  Gotta call the movers tomorrow if they are open or Monday and get an appointment.


I have decided that I am gonna hold of on starting a Sunday game until after I have run the Wednesday night game for a few weeks along with the ongoing Friday night game.  Just makes sense to make sure I can handle 2 games before going into a 3rd.  I’m sure I can, but want to make sure.

I am going to be advertising for the game on reddit’s Looking for Group page.  And on a couple of Facebook groups.  Should have no problem getting players once I decide to start looking.  The Sunday group will be the first group I run without someone I know playing in it, EVER.  A little intimidating, but its all good.

And I have decided that I do not like roll20.net .  Well, it’s definitely not for me.  All the games being advertised on reddit seem to use roll20 and Discord.  I know I don’t care for Discord.   Roll20 is a website that lets you track all the players and rolls dice and shows maps and so forth.  Lazy DMmanship.  I can pain the picture in my players heads and I trust my players to roll dice and I trust players to keep track of stuff themselves.  I talked about Discord yesterday I think, does things I don’t know how, but I can’t record it.  And I really like having the option to record the game sessions.  So I will use pencil and paper (computer) and good old D&D Dice for playing and Mumble for the talking part cuz it allows me to record.


Oh, I am thinking of taking my wife’s old computer (remember I mentioned she commandeered my Mac) and turning into a mumble server.  Then I wouldn’t have to worry about using my friend’s mumble server.  Not that he minds, he offered actually.  But I would feel better running it on my own.


This weekend we are cleaning the rest of the back 40.  Most people use the term to refer to their yards, we use it to refer to the back half of our bedroom.  Yes, it’s that big.  We cleaned 1/2 for my set up now.  Need the other half cleaned out to bring my Desk and stuff from storage.  Lots of junk is piled there as of now as its been a collecting point of “stuff” for the 13 years we have lived here.

It shouldn’t take too long too clean out.  Throwing most of this junk away.  Just need to sort of the few gems in the pile and find a home for them.  I figure we will be done in about 3 hours like the first half of the back 40 took.


Slowly taking a class from Udemy.com (they have video classes for just about everything).  The class is on web development.  Supposedly, it will give me the ability to get a job as a website designer.  Don’t want a job.  Don’t need a job.  Do want to build at least 1 really cool website, which I will talk about in another post or six later.


Ah, the ibuprofen has fully kicked in.  The only pain that is still severe in the pain in my neck/shoulder area.  NOTHING I have ever done has taken care of that pain when it has decided to hurt.  Not acupuncture, not shots, not dilaudid, NOTHING.  I hurts and it hurts severely when it does.  The rest of the back feels ok now.


udemy-logo

Need a new desk

Painwise I have hurt most of the day.  My back can’t take sitting or standing very well.  Only recourse is to lay down, which will lead to excessive napping, which will mean I won’t sleep at night, which means I will disturb Teresa. oh, this goes on and on.  Basically, any way I work this I end up hurting.  I’m hoping that the pain doc’s office will call soon so I can get the pain taken care of.


My mood took a turn down today.  I guess I look forward to the D&D games more than I realized and it thru my bipolar brain into a not so slight downswing.  Everything is going so well in my life, got nothing else to complain about.  Has to be cuz of the stupid D&D games being cancelled.  Trying to look forward to next week, but its blah this week.


We did get a second monitor hooked up to my system today.  That was a bright spot in an otherwise gloomy day.  Now I can be doing stuff on one screen while reading Facebook on the other.  Cool Cool, so very cool.


My new computer set up is kind of nice.  Although my desk is entirely too short (hey, it was free).  Gotta replace the cardboard box table with another table from the Family Dollar store.  But beyond those 2 little things, its very comfy and very practical.  Maybe for Christmas or my Birthday I will get a big boy desk (craigslist) and then I wouldn’t need so many small tables.


I think I may be crazy, but I am thinking seriously about setting up 1 more online D&D game.  This time on Sunday afternoons, so that my west coast friends that play have the option of joining the game.  Gonna probably switch to DISCORD for voice chat software.  Then I won’t be tying up my friend mumble server and using his bandwidth.  DISCORD is free and somehow runs locally on everyone’s computer.  Really beyond my feeble brain capacity to figure out how it works.  Anyhow, if we use DISCORD we won’t be able to record the sessions.  So, I gotta think about this.  And furthermore, gotta think about if I really can handle a 3rd session a week.  Heh, it’s not like I have anything else to do with my time, might as well play D&D.


Our dogs are definitely getting used to me not being in bed all the time.   They still get confused when Teresa tells them to “Go see Daddy” for a treat.  They start to run to the bed, then turn around slowly, and then run back to me.


I still miss my Mom and Brother, but not as much as I have recently.  It’s right after seeing them when it’s bad, now its just a generalized miss.  I tell ya though, if Jet Blue flew in to/out of Des Moines, I would have flown to see them again on Jet Blue’s special they are having.  But nope, no Jet Blue around here.  So, it’ll be November when I see them again.


We LOVE the new stove.  It rocks.  We have barely touched what it’s capable of doing, but it’s wonderful.  Had to cut down cooking times of everything we cooked in our old stove.  3 to 5 minutes usually.  The difference from the old stove which wasn’t close to correct temp or the new stove which holds the correct temp like a champion.  Whirlpool made a great product there.


Oh hell, I almost forgot.  I got a big adult type desk in storage.  Don’t really know how to get it here or how to put it together.  But hey, I own a big desk that would hold all this stuff and then some.   It’s totally the wrong color for this room, but hey, it’s already paid for.  I guess it might be time to bug Drew to come do me a solid.  Below is the desk I have in storage.  Would be nice to put it back in use somewhere… why not here?


Layout-SLR_ACL-300x240

Blah… with promise

In what promised to be an excellent week of D&D gaming, both games get cancelled.  Yup, the Wednesday night game was cancelled due to 2 people having family emergency issues and the Friday night game was cancelled due to the main player of the storyline’s computer being ill.  Technically we could still play on Friday but I don’t have time to redo the storyline so it would just kinda be a blah ending to 3 weeks of good adventure.  I’m glad it was decided to cancel.


Teresa is going on travel again the end of the month.  I hate when she goes on travel, and since I “got better” she has been going on more and more travel.  I guess I shouldn’t complain too much, she is getting paid good money to do her job and I think her work looks at travel as kind of an award for doing good work.  I forgot to ask her where she was going, probably New York again.


My back is still thrashed.  I don’t know if I can take this level of pain until August 17th.  I hope they call me in sooner, wish people would cancel appointments.  It’s not like I need much notice, 2 hours notice is good enough for me, but they always give at least 24 hours, so it’s all good.  I hurt, I hurt badly, but I will get thru it, I always do.


My new nightstand/bookshelf arrived today.  Teresa assembled it.  It’s the perfect size for D&D books.  And the top is big enough to hold all my stuff that I kept of my desk that I use.  CPAP, fan, wallet, keys, ipad, cell phone.  All of it fits on top just fine with room for extra stuff.  I’m happy.


I still am trying to find an in person D&D game locally that I can play in.  Yeah, I love DMing, but I miss playing.  I will find one eventually, there has to be one somewhere for a forty something gamer who loves to play.


Teresa ordered me a cable so I can have a second monitor on my computer.  Have a nice 24″ Acer monitor which would very much fill the bill.  Just don’t have the proper cable at this time.  The proper cable will be here Friday.


Pucky and Mojo are a bit confused with me not being in bed all day.  They come rushing in to the room and run onto the bed, do a quick look for me, then it dawns on them that I am over at the computer area and they come over for treats.  It’s funny, it’s cute.


Our first payment on the house cleared the bank today.  YAY.  Payments are still less than what we were paying in rent and we will own the house in less than 15 years.  Yeah buddy.


I still haven’t called to make a payment towards the vacation.  Gotta get on that for this month, just feeling lazy.


Yesterday was Pucky’s birthday.  He turned 7.  So happy to have him and Mojo in my life.

hqdefault

The return of the CPAP and weird sleep

Yeah, I was without my CPAP for 3 weeks cuz the mask pads had stretched too much and it leaked all over the place, including into my eye.  Finally got 2 replacement pads and 1 new mask with pad.  So it was back to CPAP for me starting two nights ago.  Well, the same thing happened to me when I first started with the full mask, I slept like 4 hours and then WOKE UP.  Not groggy or anything, just wide awake.  Then I would get tired and take a nap later.  It’s happening again.  It’ll take about a week for my body to get used to it and I will be able to sleep normally again.  I can’t wait.


Finally got enough players for my Wednesday night higher level D&D game.  Will take a while to get everyone set up, but we are hoping to start running by July 5th if everyone is in town.  Due to scheduling issues instead of 6 to 8 central time we are running 5:05 to 7:05pm central time.  This is gonna put a crunch on me eating dinner, but heh, I want to play, so I will deal.

So far we have a Cleric and a Sorcerer and 3 unknown classes.  10 days to get characters made and magic items distributed and make sure everyone can connect to the mumble server.  It’s all good, if I have to make their characters for them, I will.  I actually enjoy making characters so it’d be fun.  But right now, we are waiting on 2 of the players to pick their classes so the 3rd will pick his.  He wants to fill the hole, I can respect that.

I am debating sending an NPC along with them.  As long as I don’t have to play an NPC healer, it’s cool.  With a full blown life cleric I don’t think healing is an issue.  Having a permanent NPC in the party is actually kinda useful, any info that they need to know the NPC can just supply it.  But this is gonna be a well balanced party, so I may not run an NPC along.  We shall see how they gel before I get to into the idea.


Thursday is trigger point injection day.  Thank the gods for small miracles.  Get a couple shots with really big needles then be on my way.  Hopefully pain free.


I totally missed Chipolte day for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  I meant to go get a burrito and the next thing I knew it was the next day.  Oh well, they still get my smile.amazon.com money.


We are about to make our first payment on the house.  It gets withdrawn on July 1.  I would say I was excited, but I am not really.  Autopay is autopay and I just watch to make sure there is enough money in the account for it, and that is not an issue anymore.


I will also be making my first payment (well second, but first since the deposit) for my mom and my vacation next August.   I figure my share will be paid off in 8 months.  So it’s all good.


I haven’t went on my diet yet, but I can tell just in how I have changed how and when I eat, I have lost some weight.  Not a whole lot, but enough to notice.


AmazonSmileLogo

Home

Got back to Des Moines a little after 11.  Got to leave the airport at 11:24.  Got home shortly after midnight.  1st flight I was next to a guy who didn’t speak English, no chatting there.  2nd flight was next to a lawyer who spent the whole time with his nose in his phone reading an email article so not chatting there either.  So, the flights were fairly quick and exceptionally boring.


The buckle on my belt sets off the machines at the airport.  On the way there, it was a quick pat down along the back of my belt.  On the way back, the guy checked front back sides, all around, including checking the package to make sure I didn’t have anything extra hidden there.  But heh, I got thru it, so it’s all good.  But for the record I don’t plan on flying into Midway again unless Delta makes a direct flight from Des Moines (which is highly unlikely to happen).  I had my 2nd rudest treatment by an airline person ever by a southwest baggage check lady.  Bad enough I am tempted to write southwest a bitchfest letter.  The worst still goes to the collective bunch at United.


Had Leukemia chat tonight.  The regular moderator was absent, the replacement moderator is an old friend.  Either she has notes or one hell of a memory.  But she remembered all sorts of things about the chatters that I had totally forgotten.  But all the moderators of Leukemia chat are great.


Made the reservation for the room the day before the cruise next August.  It’s all about getting a much pre-secured as possible.  So I don’t have to worry about it later.  I would book our flights too, but airlines don’t release the info for flights til 11 months before.  So, I can’t book the flights til September, which is also about when I will get current excursion information.  Holland America gives a slight discount if you book your excursions before the cruise.  So, that is the plan.  Have everything all ready and paid for so we can just get on the boat and go.


The doggies seemed to have missed me.  I haven’t been without at least one of them since I woke up today for more than 5 minutes.  I missed them too.  I love my Chihuahuas, they are such good doggies.


Some day I might make it to England and/or Scotland, but for now that dream is put on the backburner.  My back is just too thrashed to even consider riding on a bus for 14 days, let alone the long flights to and back.  I really do want to go.  Hopefully once I get myself together, I will get to the acupuncturist and start a real treatment plan.  That costs money though that is currently being diverted to paying for the cruise.  So, for now, back treatments happen when I hurt too much to think and not a real plan to permanently fix my problems.  Plus I am not sure I trust either acupuncturist that I have seen here to do the job right.  Oh well, I am gonna have to trust one I guess.  Probably little Chinese guy, cuz the White guy never once suggested herbs or anything else.


I’m gonna start back to Ant’s bipolar chat tomorrow.  Today was mostly spent asleep.


My car is sick again.  Most annoying.  Won’t back up.  Goes into reverse real fine, just the parking break is messed up.   So they will rebuild that again, charge us a small fortune, and it’ll make my 12 year old car good for a few more years, I hope.


I was right,  I have a couple pissed off players in my Mumble D&D game.  It was bound to happen and it was nothing personal.  Wizards just made that one expansion too powerful as a whole.  So I banned the expansion, the good news for the players should be that I am not using it against them either.


I had my first experience using the new stove tonight.  ooooooooooooooooooooooooo fancy.  Having a stove actually cook at the right temperature was a pleasant experience.  It has way too many buttons and features, but hey the price was right and it’s what Teresa wanted.  So, happy wife, happy life.


After my car gets fixed, I will be joining the gym I mentioned a few blog posts ago.  With the weather getting really hot and really humid here, I have no intention of walking there.  So, when my car gets fixed, I will go.  Don’t want to be wiped out before even getting to the gym.  As for the diet part, it’s being put off a little bit too, because I have a bunch of frozen stuff I need to eat that I don’t have points for.  But the diet is going to start sooner and opposed to later.


Thanks to my brother, I am discovering late 90s music for basically the first time.  After we moved to Iowa we got cable immediately and I listened to either 80s stuff or classic rock or alternative.  Music Choice 90s is exposing me to stuff I haven’t heard before.   I had written the 90s off as bad rap and other crap music.  Turns out there really was some nice music in the 90s.  Go figure.


It feels really great to be home, even though I am missing my mom and brother really bad right now.  Home is where I feel the most comfortable.  Home is where the love of my life is.  I just wish my mom and brother still lived close.  But then my brother wouldn’t have the job he has now and both he and mom would be pretty much miserable.  So the best I can do right now is go see them twice a year and hope that one or both of them come to visit here.


Jimmy turns 50 next year, mom actually thought I would miss that.  NOT A CHANCE.  Have to be there for the big 50 for my bro.  And I have to out due my gift to him for 49, which was a gargoyle toilet paper dispenser.  Hmmm, I got a little less than a year to come up with something EPIC.

81Jv0BuTW2L._SL1200_